Vegan Month day 3

Every single morning I wake up and crave food, I instantly start chanting internally "I'm vegan now, I'm vegan now, vegan vegan vegan. No dairy, no eggs, no meat, no *gulp* cheese. No animal by products. Must be aware. Be aware. I'm vegan now, I'm vegan now." 

Not going to lie, its kind of been a struggle. I keep asking myself, "Okay, I can't eat that, what do I eat?" And come up with blanks.

Luckily there is this amazing website called finding-vegan.com which is like a RSS feed of vegan recipes online, in picture form. It is simply the most amazing website I've stumbled upon (quite literally- I love stumbleupon.com!) since icanhazcheezburger.com.



Lunch is Thai Kitchen: Thai Peanut Rice Noodles and sauce. I hope it tides me over til tonight. I'm making cornfritters for dinner/tomorrows breakfast.

I usually buy coffee and a pastry on fridays as my "reward" for making it through the week, and for making it to work so early (its the only day I work 9-5). Until I become more comfortable in my veganism, all bets are off, so no more coffee shop stops for me.

Tomorrow night I'm going to figure out what to do with my tempeh for dinner.           

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Todays lunch

I made Quinoa Puttenesca for lunch today. This recipe was modified from Appetite for Reduction: 125 Fast and Filling Low-Fat Vegan Recipes... it included capers. I don't know what they are, and to be perfectly honest, I intend living the rest of my life without discovering their nature. I replaced them with feta.

It also called for white wine which I didn't have on hand so I replaced that with vegetable broth. It's quite tasty. I like the contrast of the quinoa with the olives and cheese. It was a nice change from regular pasta. I do love me some kalamata olives, and this was my first time actually cooking with them. Its been a long time since I've had quinoa and I forgot how much I enjoy the nuttiness and the crunchiness. Like little globes popping in your mouth with every bite.

I was in quite the rush today. I went to the gym this morning, after waking up and dreading the idea of getting out of bed. It was a great experience! I finished W2D1 of c25k. I also did 15 minutes on the elliptical cause I love that thing. Though, there was this lunk there that hopped on the treadmill between me and some other dude, even though there were plenty others available, and then kept looking at our progress and making faces. He would just stare until I looked over at him. It was frustrating because I was doing awesome! I kept my heart rate in check and didn't give up even when I was running out of time to catch the bus, and this guy is going to pass judgment on me for what? His own damn ego? I'mma throw a stick on his treadmill next time!

So I've got about 4 more hours of work left before I go home, and my body is deliciously sore, and my tummy deliciously sated. All and all its been a pretty good day. Going to hit it hard tomorrow, and then Friday is my friends birthday. We're going to the museum and I don't know what else but it should be a good long day!

Avocado Avocado!

Breakfast
2 eggs, cheddar cheese and spinach in an omelet form, about a cup of orange juice. Sugar free rockstar.

Lunch
Spinach salad with feta cheese, green onion, avocado and orange. Raspberry vinaigrette dressing.

Dinner
2 quesadillas, 2 heaped tablespoons of sour cream, 1 avocado.



Exercise
35 mins Zumba
20 minutes stretching

I ate breakfast in a rush today. I was running behind this morning because of my inability to wake up before 9am. I should probably start going to bed earlier, but I just can't. I can't wait until the sun comes up at 5am and I only need 3 hours of sleep to get through the night.

Lunch happened around 3:30ish, I cut up the avocado which was nearly bad and the orange, threw it in my salad and went to town. It held me over until dinner where I had a couple quesadillas with my last avocado.*

I'm going to stop buying avocado. I love them so much that its starting to border on obsession. Also, I only go shopping once every other week, so when I buy several avocados, they all ripen at the same time, and I feel "pressured" to eat them. And by pressured I mean overjoyed. But alas, even with all the healthy benefits of avocado, eating two whole ones a day simply is not going to produce the results I'm looking for. So, I've got one today, one for tomorrow, and then I'm limiting myself buying ONE one the rest of my shopping trips. I wish they froze well.

(*I wrote all the above just before lunch. Its 1130pm, and I've just finished eating dinner.)

The difference a few hours makes is astounding. The differences a few minutes make can be legendary. The difference a few seconds can make could rock your world.

I struggled to make dinner. I was in the middle of washing dishes, and just didn't have a feeling of  "fuel body" but I was worried once I went to bed (or even just sat down) that I would realize I was hungry, and then suddenly be to the point of not caring what went inside. So I stopped washing dishes and started preparing dinner. It should have been a relatively easy thing to do. I make dinner every night, I have since I was 12. But noticing that I wasn't hungry, did I then decide to pass on the avocado? It seemed to be just wasteful to not eat the whole thing, but damn, two avocados in a day? Really? Is that going to help me lose weight? I thought about throwing the other half away- and why that simply wouldn't be acceptable. Its avocado. Then I pondered the possibility of eating it all, as a final hurrah of sorts. But how are you supposed to lose weight when your are constantly having a "last hurrah!"? Not very easily, I suspect. Finally I threw my hands up in the air and wondered how the hell I was supposed to lose any weight at all if my thinking about food is so disordered? How the hell am I supposed to navigate that mess I've weaved over the last 25 years?

Breakthrough. I mashed up the whole avocado. I would eat it mindfully. I would focus all my attention on the texture and flavor, the way the cheese melts and the tanginess of the sour cream. I would not allow myself to feel guilty. I would stop eating when I was full. If that meant I ate the entire avocado, then that was okay and I was not going to feel guilty about it. I've already made a decision to never keep that many avocados in my house again. 

I turned off the tv, I sat down in front of the table. I closed my eyes and took a breath. I asked my body on a scale of 1 to 10, how hungry it was. It answered with a surprised 8. I began to take my first bite.

And then I heard a rapid exchange of knocking, or to my already panicked ears, gun fire. (You have to understand, my neighbors who recently seperated, have not had the kind of relationship that is afraid of phsyical arguments. When alcohol is involved, who knows what could happen. I'm not ready for that kind of eventuality, and I freaked out.) I grabbed my plate (because I was starved at that point, like I hadn't eaten all day and not just the last 6 hours) and went up to my room. I locked my door. I ate at the avocado, and the rest of the first quesadilla, with little mindfulness. I was too busy listening for screams, shuffling bodies, or sirens. But the food calmed me. It served its old purpose well, I guess. I came back downstairs after I was sure the "coast was clear", and sat down, turned on the tv and continued to eat the second quesadilla with the rest of the avocado. I am completely overwhelmed at how much effort I had to put into tonight's dinner. It should have been a simple, quiet, dinner, followed by bed. Instead I'm rattled and worried, and feeling a little guilty about how I ate.

On the bright side, no more Avocados.

Food log 2/1/11

Breakfast
Breakfast cookie, banana, half cup hot cocoa. (My whey protein curdled in my mug. I was pretty distraught.)

Lunch
2 cups black bean corn couscous salad, breakfast cookie, handful of trailmix. (I felt starved all day at work. It was terrible.)

Dinner
whole grain spaghetti with broccoli, spinach, and alfredo sauce. breakfast cookie, hot chocolate, skinny cow ice cream, 7 parmesean pretzel crackers, I think thats it.


So I'm kind of noticing that I'm eating breakfast cookies as um, not breakfast food. When I do look to eat one, its usually "to replace an additional part of my meal, like meat." At least I think thats whats going through my head when I try to justify it. I think the safest thing to say here is, there is no such thing as a "safe" cookie. They're either all the devil or their all forgivable. There is no middle.

Exercise
25 mins Zumba + additional stretching, and walking .75 of a mile (which I'm never sure whether or not to include this .75 of a mile because its part of my daily commute).

Tomorrow I gotta focus on my homework. I'm starting to feel... rushed. Also, I'm really tired, and probably should have just left this part out. Good night, good morning, Namaste.

Food log 1/31/11

Breakfast

Chonga bagel skinny mocha

Lunch
spinach swiss tomato and kalamata olives on multigrain bread- delish. 20 oz cherry coke.

Dinner
Breakfast cookie banana santa fe rice and beans by eating right.

Monday I was so tired. Two people in my office are sick right now, and I'm kinda worried I'm gonna be next. Monday night I went home, and watched an episode of Heavy. I was actually kind of impressed, I like the flow of the show. I felt so bad watching the show and just sitting there, that I started stretching, which led me into some free style yoga. I even did 20 push ups on my knees.

And then something happened. I found a second, third and fourth wind at 9pm (all at the same time!), and couldn't get myself to settle down until well after 2am. I don't know if this is something I should complain/worry about because well, who doesn't want an extra burst of energy just before the day ends? I guess I wish I just handled it better. I was really confused and didn't know what to do, so I did a little bit of everything but didn't really do much of anything.

Oh well. Tuesday is a new day.

Food Log 1/26/11

Breakfast
1 bagel with cream cheese, 1 cup poor mans mocha (drip coffee + hot cocoa) with 1/2 serving vanilla whey protein, handful of cashews

Lunch
1 serving "traditional lentil soup" by "healthy choice" (Or as I like to call it; GROSS), 2 oz hummus, 1 serving wheat thins, 1 16 oz can pineapple in its own juice.

Dinner
4 beef flavored vegetarian taquitos, 3 tbs cheese, 2 tbs sour cream, 2 tbs southwest salsa; diet pepsi. fiber plus bar.

Snack
3 dried apricots, handful of cashews.



So right now, I have lots of food to make certain items, but nothing that really makes a meal. Thats one thing that always bothered me about vegetarianism; I always feel relegated to the side items. No main course for me.

Food Log 1/25/11

Breakfast
Half kashi go lean crunch half special k red berries plus 1 cup almond milk.

Filling and delicious. Don't really care for plain almond milk. I'll keep trying it though. Bought this Silk brand this time.

Lunch
20 oz. Mt. dew 1 serving easy mac


Not particularly pleased, but my cupboards are running out of prepackaged food and I just haven't had time to cook, but I'm hoping to create a menu for next week and see how that goes. Try to control my portions a little better.

Dinner
Two pork purses with sauce, 5 oz. short rib on a bed of curry sauce covered polenta, about 1.5 oz peanut butter pie with oreo crust and chocolate ganashe. 2 16 oz cokes. A handful of cashews.

I don't think I have to tell you how delicious it all was. Because it was. Every bite was mouth watering. I ate every single bite. And while my stomach whined about it later, I figured it was okay because I'll probably never eat dinner there again. (totes expensive)

Now, lunch on the other hand....

Food Log 1/24/11

Breakfast

Skinny raspberry mocha and an herb and cheese bagel with cream cheese

Lunch
2 pieces of pizza

Dinner
1 slice of pizza; 1/2 cup cashews, 12 oz diet pepsi, fiber plus bar, 16 oz. hot cocoa.

Exercise
1 mile of walking

Last night was such a struggle for me to not eat. I spent nearly 10 minutes rummaging my cupboards before forcefully reminding myself that I wasn't hungry, just bored, it was late and I needed to go to bed. I dragged my sorry self upstairs, and eventually tuckered out of the night. It was a terrible struggle however.

When Change Rains, it Pours

On Wednesday last week, I tweeted about not having any real defined goals. So, over this weekend, I decided to define them. But first, a weekend recap.

Friday I was supposed to go to a concert a local bar, but I just felt horrible all day, so I stayed home and tried to get some rest. Saturday, my friend who recently came home from Afghanistan via the Army came into town and I took her to see Avenue Q. Avenue Q, for those who don't know, is a wonderfully subversive musical with Jim Henson like puppets, and Gary Coleman as played by a woman. It is fantastic. I was really happy to be able to take her to something that was so hilariously upbeat considering some of the subjects they hit upon. And I worried that being in the middle of the row, and having a full audience might cause her some panic but she handled the whole thing pretty well.

Afterward, we went to Spenard Roadhouse for dinner, which is one of my favorite restaurants in town. Its very eclectic, casual, and trendy. Family oriented, but serves all your favorite alcoholic drinks. I don't eat out often, but when I do, I try to come here. I love it. For dinner I had a veggie sandwich (apparently I am not a fan of fontina cheese- who knew) and split pea and ham soup (cause I'm a flexitarian now and I can eat meat when I eat out). Oh yes, and an order of super tots, which are possibly deadly. Tater tots topped with chives, green onions, cheddar cheese, bacon and sour cream.  We talked about all sorts of things, caught up on everything she'd missed while she was gone. She told me she started running while overseas, and I mentioned to her my goal of running a 5k by the end of the summer. She's being stationed in Hawaii, and so, plans started forming in my head.

Because we had gone to the early show, when dinner was over, it was still kinda early, so we headed off to the movies and watched No Strings Attached. Did I love it? Of course I did. I love Natalie Portman and most romantic comedies. My friend dropped me off afterwards, and I comptemplated cleaning my kitchen. I think I watched How I Met Your Mother and went to bed instead.


It was a great day, but I couldn't help but notice how much of the day I spent sitting. I didn't particularly want to sit, but I couldn't think of anything that sounded remotely fun that didn't involves lots of sitting.

Sunday was my day of rest. Of course by day of rest, I mean it was my day of cleaning and school work, and watching Sarah Marshall twice- once with commentary and once without. For brunch I had easy mac and a fiber plus bar. I wanted to cook something, but my kitchen is half destroyed right now cause I can't seem to wash all my dishes in one go, so I ordered an extra large pizza instead. Why? I don't know. It seemed easier, I guess. I ordered a garlic veggie supreme and mozzarella sticks. (THIS IS HOW PEOPLE STAY FAT, JSYK). I ate half of it before forcing myself to go to bed.

The good news though. After my conversation with my friend, I started looking at races happening in Hawaii around my birthday. The closest one I could find is the Maui Marathon on Sept. 18th this year. I am going. My mother is going. My friend is going. Its going to be great.

Now, if you are actually viewing my blog, you might notice a new widget on the right side of the screen. Its to raise money for the Warmth Walk sponsored by United Way Anchorage on Feburary 19th. I will be walking. Its only a mile, and should go pretty quickly, but I thought it would be a nice way to get excited for Break Up (known in other parts of the country as "Spring") and the Summer to come! So if anyone would like to donate some dollars, your help is much appreciated.

So to recap. Short term and long term goals have been defined:

Short term: Walk for Warmth; getting as physically ready for c25k as possible
Medium term: Womens Walk for Cure (or some such thing in May); start/complete c25k; other races as applicable
Long term: Flying my mother and myself to Maui for the 41st Maui Marathon in Sept (I'm going to walk/run the 1/2).; maintaining flexitarianism, make healthy food choices; see consistent weight loss.

This is going to be a great summer.

Food Log 1/20/11

Breakfast
Single serving brie, sesame crackers, half an apple.

Lunch
Peanut butter oatmeal m&m chocolate chip cookie (1 large cookie, just so that's clear. I was confused too.) two cups veggie spanish rice with cheese, diet coke.

Graduation
1 piece cake, 3 stalks broccoli, 1 baby carrot, 3 snap peas, dip, one cup of punch.

Dinner
1.5 cups veggie spanish rice with cheese and sour cream.


Exercise

20 mins Zumba.

My work has an alternative high school that has a mid school year graduation. 10 students graduated, 5 of them showed up this year. I acted as photographer 2.  It was really beautiful. I am always inspired by these kids who go through hell to get their diploma, but do it anyway. They don't know just how amazing their achievement is at that point. The day you receive your diploma is the day people take you just a little more seriously. I'm so proud of all of them, and really happy that I got to be apart of their success.

Food Log 1/19/11

Breakfast

sundried tomato bagel with creamcheese and two eggs with regular cheddar cheese.

Lunch

1 can of vegetarian chilli with 1/4 cup cheese

Dinner
4 vegetarian beef flavored taquitos, one dollop of sour cream. Cheese. 4 cupcakes.

Food Log 1/17/11

Breakfast

Fiber plus bar- chocolate chip
Water

Lunch
Half a Brie (spinach tomato aioli and basil) panini; 10 oz. cherry soda.

Snack
Other half of brie sandwich- other half of 10 oz. soda

Dinner
Butternut squash ravioli by Eating Right. two red velvet cupcakes.

Food log 1/16/11

Breakfast
half of three banana chocolate chip pancakes, a cup of almond milk, 3 scrambled eggs with 1/2 cup hashbrowns.

Lunch
The other half of those three awesomely declious pancakes

Dinner
3 short spare ribs which were absolutely to die for and creamy Parmesan polenta, a blackberry shag (vodka and sprite, blackberries), a partial serving of super tater tots, and a s'more. So delicious.

Snack
Apple


I went out to dinner with my friends, after wandering around the museum for two hours with their kids. It was a fantastic night. The two year old put his hands on an Andy Warhol! OMG. I've always wanted to do that.

Food Log 1/13/11

Breakfast
Kashi/Special K red berries w/ chocolate soy milk
Water

Lunch
foot long veggie delite from subway. 20 oz cherry coke.
Water


Dinner
Eating Right cheese pizza with three tablespoons extra cheese
fiber plus chocolate chip bar
2 tablespoons of cream cheese frosting and a 100 cal pack of oreos
crystal light
Water

Food Log 1/6/11

Breakfast
a failed attempt at box mac and cheese. took about 6 bites before I threw the rest away. (I blame its cheap quality and will insist til my departing that it was not me over boiling, it was the cheap waterlogged noodles.)

Lunch
Italian veggie sandwich on sourdough,
2 servings of kettle chips,
vitamin water zero,
Large Chocolate chip cookie.


Dinner
frozen Mac and Cheese (Eating Right) dinner,
water,
2 tablespoons creamcheese frosting,
1/2 cup chocolate soymilk,
3/4 cup trailmix,
100 cal pack of oreos.

Exercise
20 minutes Zumba

Food Log 1/5/11

Breakfast
Special K red berries with Chocolate soy milk

Lunch
Rice noodle bowl sans mushrooms
1 cup trailmix
6 oz lemonade
banana

Dinner
1.5 servings of cheese ravioli with 1/2 cup marinara sauce and two tablespoons Parmesan cheese
1/2 cup orange juice
4 tablespoons cream cheese frosting
2 swigs chocolate soy milk

Food Log 1/4/11

Breakfast
Egg and cheese bagel sandwich with cream cheese
hot cocoa with half a scoop of vanilla whey protein powder

Lunch
Healthy choice cheese tortellini soup
1 serving wheat thins
6 oz lemonade
water

Dinner
3 small quesadillas with fat free refried beans and 3 tablespoons sour cream
2 oz fudge
2 diet cherry cokes

Food Blog

Accountability. It only happens if you allow it to happen. Not posting here, means I don't have to account for what I've eaten. Its so weird how its so easy to ignore that, to forget that.


Breakfast consisted of a turkey bacon croissant. Guess how I justify that? It has protein. I could have chosen the white chocolate cherry croissant instead. (Or you know, not have eaten either, and chosen something different all together... perhaps the bran muffin?) I also had a 16 oz. Raspberry mocha. Yum.

I snacked on about 4 pieces of fudge. My mom sent me about 2 pounds of fudge, and about a dozen popcorn balls for Christmas. What a sweetie, right? (Sarcasm is optional.)

Lunch started around 2:30, and was bought at the restaurant next door. I purchased a cheese burger, fries, and a 20 oz. coke. I didn't eat all the fries, but I ate the hell out of that cheeseburger. It was delicious.

My kitchen looks like a war zone, but I'll bet as soon as I'm done cleaning it, I'll want to cook something for dinner.  Thus the vicious cycle of having a dirty kitchen continues.

One good thing to mention, though I'm not really sure what it says about me, I am only eating when I'm hungry. I stop eating when I'm full. I make sure to check in with myself. I may be eating terribly, but I'm doing my best to manage the quantity.

Hm. Writing this out is more difficult than I remember it being.

ETA: For dinner, I ate two cups of rice-a-roni fried rice with chicken that I cooked, three chocolate chip cookies, 2 popcorn balls, and one large glass of milk. 

The Underworld of Night Eating

I wake up at 7:49am, crawl out of bed and into the shower. I try my best to wake up. Then I crawl out of the shower and back into bed until 9am, when I finally decide that I must get dressed, go down stairs and eat breakfast because I'm in for a long day. I have my daily cereal (half Kashi Go Lean Crunch, half Special K: Red Berries, with chocolate soy milk) pack my school bag, and by 9:30 I'm out the door. I go to class, become inundated with new information to be processed, then rush my way to work by noon. At work I sit at my desk and stare mindlessly at my computer, feeling my blood sugar drop lower and lower until I finally recognize the feeling as hunger and grab my lunch. (this weeks lunch: Pork loin roast with potatoes and carrots, with a side of grapes) Some times I eat it in front of my computer. Sometimes I don't. If I'm lucky, I have actual tasks to do, but more often than not, I wait for something that never happens. Finally my work day ends at 8pm and I head home. While sitting on the bus I think, "maybe I'll do some homework. I need to clean my kitchen. I need to do 20 minutes of yoga the minutes I walk through the door." However, as soon as I walk through the door, I rush to my room, take off my work clothes, throw on my pajamas, race back down stairs and check the refrigerator to see what I can eat.

At this very point, I realize I have an opportunity to be good today. To reach for something healthy, or if not healthy, to eat it in a way that is mindful and not mindless. What usually happens is I grab the more unhealthy than healthy option, sit in front of the TV, and forget that I'm breaking one of my cardinal rules: Thou shall not eat in front of  back lit screens. From that moment, is where it all goes to parch. Suddenly, I want something sweet. Right now, my home happens to full of all sorts of sweet things because the last time I went shopping, I went without purpose and didn't get anything I meant to. I know the right thing to do would be throw it all out, to give it away, to do anything but EAT it, but part of this journey is relearning how to be around food. For the first time in my life I don't have to fight anyone for the left overs in the fridge. If I want my cookies to last a day or a month, its up to me to make that happen. And so the junk stays. (Example: I have four individual servings of Ben and Jerry's ice cream in my freezer right now, that have been there since the beginning of August.)

Then a new problem arises when I have my dinner, I'll have the handful of gummy worms, followed by a soda, and I just munch and munch and munch. I don't even know what I'm eating, just that I am. Last night I ate a second dinner because I didn't feel full enough. I was in some sort of manic mode, and I was in such a fog that I couldn't stop to figure out why I felt that way. Midnight hit, and I forced myself to go to bed. (Sleep didn't come for a few more hours, however.)

I've done this every night for two weeks. I'm so tired by the time I get home, I can't lift a finger to do anything except comfort myself.

I want to be the person who finds their second wind upon entering their house, and proceeds to work hard and sweat. I know somewhere deep inside me there is a potential for it. I know I won't be that person until I start acting like that person. I guess I just wish it was easier.


Todays weight: 308
(I must be doing something right...)

Insert Witty Title Here

Body Terrorist Alert: I am starting to notice myself slipping into mindlessness again. I ate half of a pudding snack because it was dark and we were re-watching the second season of Grey's Anatomy, before I realized I hadn't thought it through, I hadn't taken a picture, I had barely acknowledged that I was eating it in the first place.

Yesterday was another day of huge emotional mood swings. My roommate has been sick with like a whooping cough these past few days, and every time she tries to hock a loogie, or clear her throat, its this long drawn out, potentially unnecessary gross squabble in her throat, and everything time I hear it, I just want to mutilate my eardrums. No joke, I sit and twitch every single time she does it. Thinking about it makes me want to vomit.

She's been a major source of stress for me as of late, mostly because we live together, and work together, and on top of it all, we work the same schedule. And yes, we have the same friends. She is perfectly lovely person (most of the time), but sometimes, a girl just needs a break. I... I crave my solitude sometimes, and I'm not allowed to have it in our house most days. Its very frustrating.

So I spent all weekend saying goodbye to our other friend and listening to my roommate hack and cough, and have sex while hacking and coughing, trying desperately to find a way out. I went on a couple of fabulous walks which I've already mentioned, but its just not enough. I don't even want to go home at this point.

Today, Tuesday (which feels like Monday), I ate a bowl of frosted flakes with chocolate soy milk. The minute I was done eating, my stomach turned into a knot and yelled, "THAT WAS A TERRIBLE IDEA! WHY WOULD YOU EVEN THINK TO DO THAT TO ME? WAS PLAIN SOY MILK NOT ENOUGH? WHY, LILY? WHY NOT? I NEED PROTEIN!" Needless to say, it was not the smartest decision I've made lately. Today feels like a pamphlet of un-smart decisions. I went to work without packing a lunch, and ended up ordering a cheese burger and fries from the grease join next door to my office. I washed it down with a diet soda... so I figured that would balance it out.<--- making excuses for my behavior. No, I will not make excuses. I asked my body what it wanted, and it wanted MEAT. It wanted Greasy fries, and it wanted still, protein. Of course I could have found a different source, perhaps one with less fat or whatnot. But I'm pretty sure I was supposed to eat that cheeseburger.

After work, I went food shopping for realz. The main reason behind the poorly made cereal this morning was I'm out of all the good stuff, and need to buy more. But when you don't have a car and you work later than usual, all of a sudden, food shopping is this huge deal that needs to be planned in advanced, and blah blah blah.

In other news, I weighed myself on Monday and today and I'm at 309.7. Which is pretty awesome, I think. Even with the mindless eating I caught myself in a couple of times over the weekend, I managed to still lose a little bit. I'm always surprised when the number goes down because I never think it will. <--- Talk about setting yourself up for disappointment!